Definition
  1. The sudden realization that every person you pass or encounter has a life as vivid, complex, and important to them as your own.

    synonyms:empathyperspective
Origin & Use

Sonder was coined by writer John Koenig for The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows, an online project begun in the 2010s that creates words for highly specific emotions. It is a modern invented word rather than an old term with a traditional dictionary history.


Sonder is most often used in reflective, literary, philosophical, or emotional contexts. It is not a technical, legal, medical, or scientific term, but it has become popular online as a poetic way to describe a common human realization.


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Sonder is well known in certain online, literary, and introspective communities, but it is still uncommon in everyday conversation and is not as widely established as most standard dictionary words.

Examples

Standing in the crowded train station, Maya felt a wave of sonder as she wondered where everyone was going and who they were going home to.

The old photograph filled him with sonder, reminding him that every stranger in the picture had fears, jokes, memories, and dreams of their own.

Travel often brings on sonder, especially when you realize that the people passing by are each living an entire story you will never fully know.

More Info

Sonder is a modern word for an old human feeling: the quiet shock of remembering that strangers are not background characters. It was coined by John Koenig in The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows, a project devoted to naming emotions that often go unnamed. The word is especially popular in essays, captions, poetry, and thoughtful conversations about empathy and perspective. While you may not hear it at the grocery store every day, it is a wonderfully compact way to describe a big, humbling realization. In short, sonder is what happens when the crowd suddenly becomes a collection of whole universes.

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